So, sometimes things are timely and amusing with regards to my gamer posting…and provide me with subject matter for such posts…gotta love that shit…
In any event, as of recently, the LARP game I am involved in found itself in need of a entirely new ST (storyteller) Staff. The players staged a coup on the former staff and was left…staffless! Panic ensued! An election for a new ST team was hastily organized…four candidates emerged, each running on its own platform, and each with its own style of running shit. The top three would become the new staff, the person with the most votes would be the Head Story Teller, those with the second and third most votes would be the assistant ST’s…and low and behold, when the votes and ashes cleared, the new Head ST of said game was…
Me.
Again. You see, this is not my first time to this dance. I have been involved with this game since 1995 or so, and in those many years, I have been a part of the ST staff (usually as HST) 4 times previously. Generally I actually prefer to PLAY, but when duty calls, I sort of feel it is my gamer duty to step up when needed, and on this occasion, my skillz were needed. My two Assistants are both male, and actually bear a striking resemblance to these guys: 
In fact I have said “Holy Crow, my AST’s are Jay & Silent Bob!” But in any event, ah yes, the new sheriff in town is a…chick. And thus far while things have gone smoothly and yep, the players obviously thought I was the gal for the job, there are things that have and will continue to amuse me…lemmie list a few….
1: Dude players who think they can get one over on me ‘cause they assume I don’t know all the rules. Truth is, I don’t know all the rules…but there is a book for that, and shockingly enough, I can read. Now, oddly enough, most folk don’t assume my dude AST’s don’t know the rules- and one of ‘em seemingly has all of ‘em memorized, the other one? Not so much…he too has to read. But yes, that amuses me.
2: Dude players who think complimenting me on shit will get ‘em kudos. Ha. Hahaha. Telling me I look nice is not gonna do it. It’s just not. Especially when I know for a fact that I look like crap because why the hell would I dress up to story tell a game? You never see dudes trying to butter up the dude ST’s by saying they look nice.
3: Dudes who assume my harsh treatment of their characters is due to my PMS and not their idiocy. Now, while my charming nickname within our gaming organization is “the Player-Slayer” that has nothing to do with my actions as an ST. When being an ST, I really do not go out of my way to run plots or NPC’s that will kill my player’s characters. However, if they are idiots and step in it? Shit happens. And it has nothing to do with the Moon Hut of the She Wolf Sister…it has to do with the players being idiots and stepping in it. Just like in real life, there are some NPC’s, places, and situations that popular wisdom suggests “do not fuck with this” and if you fuck with it, especially in a big way or often, there will be consequences. So when those consequences come knocking…it’s consequences, not PMS…unless my male AST’s ALSO happen to be in the Moon Hut too…
4: Gamer Chicks who assume since I am chick, the sense of sisterhood amid Gamer Girlz will inspire me to make shit easier for them than I will for the dudes. Smirk. See, when gamer chicks of this ilk realize that boobs and flirting will not help them with me, they sometimes try to appeal to my sense of sisterhood. Which makes me giggle. I am all about the gals playing and working as hard as the dudes and being as good or better on their own merit, and in the world of gaming, I so believe in equal treatment under the Rules. Oops.
5: Dudes & Chicks whom, for whatever reasons- from boobs don’t work on me to oh, man, chicks can’t game!- who refuse to deal with me and will try to do/run anything and everything with one of my male ST’s. On one level this is totally fine with me, because the less asshats I gotta deal with, the bigger the smile on my face, and frankly…uh…I know what they are up to anyhow because my Dudely ST Henchmen report in to me what is going on and what folk are up to. Go Teamwork! However, it amuses me because both my Henchmen are far more likely to just kill player characters for stupidity than I am on many occasions. Hahahahaha! Oops!
6: And my personal favorite…when folk, often male but not always, let the packaging fool them. Now, how to put this delicately….a lot of gamers are larger people. I would honestly say the average height of the gamers in this larp, men and women alike, is about…5’9”? I am several inches shy of that height myself, and sorta on the scrawny to wiry side. Often people, mostly men but not exclusively so, and mostly people who are visitors to our game, but not exclusively so, will attempt to use their actual physical size to intimidate me by getting up in my personal space. Utter fail right there. Not only does it piss me off because it’s flat out rude, I have actually thrown someone out of game for consistently doing it to female players…which is to say I have issue with this tactic… not because of me, but because it makes women gamers uncomfortable. Hell, who honestly likes to have someone who is much bigger than them towering over them, right up close, and yelling in their face? No one I reckon. However, what people who do this with me forget is…97% of the human population is bigger than me, and I have a 6’2” older brother and am used to that shit…so it ain’t gonna work…and may get thine ass booted from game. Oops.
The flip side of this is the women gamers who, and yes, I have seen it happen time and time again, will hang all over/grab on/ sit on the lap of a male gamer- usually in character- not particularly caring if the male gamer is okay with this. That is not okay either in my book- that whole unwanted contact and attention thing, in character or out, is not okay. I have not thrown a woman out of game for this…but I would. Awhile back when I was not ST’ing a female player was all over and grabbing on a male player (as her character towards his character), and it really, really bothered him. His character has no interest in sex or flirting at all, and the player is gay. He complained about her conduct and nothing was done, where frankly, if a male had done that to a female, he would have been blackballed from the game and probably the whole organization…in fact, that has happened. Well, with the New Sheriff in town, women who do this will get the same treatment. Equality and all…
I am sure as my tenure as HST goes on, I will find more examples, but there is a start. Point being…gamers, it is wise to be reasonably respectful to one’s ST regardless of gender ‘cause in the realm of the game…they are kinda like…god.
Renegade Evolution 
Ha! #6 yes.
I’m 5’0. My father and brother are 6’5ish and LARGE men. With guns and so much training they do the training now. (my dad teaches SWAT every 6 months and the class he teaches is Tactical Arms Maneuvering In A Hostage Crisis Situation. He also schools Police Academy in How To Beat The Fuck Outta Someone With a Baton) He has a blackbelt and his hands are the size of catchers mitts.
Trying to tower over me will end with you towering over a very pissed off woman who has access to your genitals and if she has to, will climb up on a chair to stare you in the eyes as she verbally eviscerates your stupid ass. (learned that one from my 5’2 mother, who got mad at my father one day and stood on the chair to yell in his face)
And guess what happens if I kick you hard enough in the kneecap? Yep. You’re no longer taller than I am. (had an abusive ex who learned this the hard way. Broken kneecap means more broken things to come very shortly)
Some of us little chicks? Yeah not only can we take care of ourselves, we can take care of YOU too, asswhipe.
Pheeno…once upon a time, my younger Cousin (on mom’s side), who was at the time, oh, about ‘5’4″. found herself whilst at High School, backed up against her own locker by a towering fellow. Said cousin was very fond of very, very long fake nails. Using said nails and the whole of her right hand in a very vicious and claw like manner, she grabbed towering fellow right by the sack, twisted, and said…”Make a Wish….”
I was so proud of her LOL.
Love it.
you;d love cousin evolution,,,,,shes….eh, her LOL
I’m amazed that people still believe that shit will work on shorter folks. Most of the short girls I know are pretty scrappy. And my killer moves that require upward momentum don’t work on them 😉 In the 2 fights I’ve been in with tiny psychos (I avoid those like the plague–no glory in fighting somebody who’s smaller than my 11-year-old son) I had to take 3& 4 shots to the face first, just to convince our audience that I wasn’t the bully. Then it was a series of exhausting wrestling moves to pin them down without maiming them. I still feel bad about having to mess up the one girl’s eyes bc she wouldn’t STFU. Oh well. She started it.
People who try to muscle short people are assholes. They deserve everything they get.
Now that stuff about table-top lapdancer geekettes is eye-opening. It might even explain my shitty experience with the LARP troops I’ve tried to play with. I had a roommate years ago who taught me AD&D and I played some good games with him and his buddies. But after we parted company, and I started chatting with other gamers, we’d play one game, I’d push a hand off my leg, and they didn’t invite me back. It wasn’t just a one-time group of idiots. This happened 3 different times.
No skin off my ass. I’m NOT so desperate for validation that I need to rub up on some geek in dental headgear for my shot at rolling for hitpoints. Metalface can check out my RL hitpoints if he thinks he’s man enough. Oh yeah, he’s not. That’s why he and his pack of nerds quietly disappeared instead of officially kicking me out of the troop.
Btw, fighting back against someone who’s smaller than an 11-year old boy probably sounds pretty awful. I wouldn’t fight at all with someone who’s smaller than the average 11-year-old boy, whether she hit first or not. My son is actually taller than his 19-year old sister. He’s just a hair over 5’5″ and is pretty close to being too tall for his boys’ size 16s. His clothes look floodsy on his wiry frame, tho. (That’s what we say up here when a skinny boy gets too tall for his bootcuts, and the hem flares out above his ankles, stork-like. We say he looks like he’s waiting for a flood, or he’s wearing floods.)