Archive for the ‘Sex’ Category

when it comes to vetting and understanding whats being expected of women, and ensuring that things are fairly applied and interpreted when it comes to *us* we have…radical feminists.  yeah, all 19 of us, taking on the same responsibilities and taking it just as seriously as a multi-billion dollar, international industry…and we are doing it, largely, with no money, and no time.  and most of the laws pertaining to us are unwritten, to boot.  (something men would never stand for by the way.  if its not written down, they dont have to do it.  simple as that).

and interestingly, our “clients” (other women) rarely appreciate our services, at all.  almost all of them fight radical feminists every fucking step of the way.  then when they have what they want, and are enjoying the fruits of our (and our mothers and grandmothers) labor, they call radical feminists fucking cunts and thank the men for “evolving.”  the lack of appreciation happens in civil and criminal defense too, but at least most lawyers dont have their clients trying to claw their way BACK INTO prison.  and most of them arent ”consensually” fucking the guards (or very deeply in love with them).

Okay, admittedly, amid the ranting and typically stupid BS of that there linked post, the woman has a point- there is/can be a lot more to sex than a penis in a vagina.  Hell, there are all kinds of things one can do other than piv sex, there are plenty of women who do not particularly like piv sex and enjoy other things a lot more, there are women who do not have piv sex at all, you name it, when it comes to sex, there is a lot more out there than piv.  Sure enough.  No arguments here, even as a gal who likes piv sex, I sure as hell know there are all different and other kinds of things out there in the great realm of sex that do not include piv. Word.  And I am pretty sure there are a whole ton of other women- even those horribly sexually available “fun” ones who know this as well.  Rock on.

But  ::glances at quoted section:: come on, you KNOW I could not resist snarking at that shit now, right?  I mean, it practically BEGS to be snarked upon.  For one, does this woman think she is the dang Clarence Darrow of woman-kind (total, all of them)?  Our great and shining liberator and advocate?  Does this meat sack, who deigns to tell women what kind of sex they can and cannot, should or should not have, tell them when they are raped and when they are not, if they can or cannot be raped, when they have choices and when they do not, how sexually available they are (or are not) to all men, or hey, if they are women or are not- blah blah blah blah blah amen honestly think that we should…oh, be fucking appreciative???

For real?  We should be lining up to say “Gee, thanks you fucking asshole for being a fucking asshole?”  One, that is what I get thanked for, and two…

Really?  Are you freakin’ nuts?  And I ask that as a person with some seriously odd wiring myself!  I mean the freakin’ arrogance is stunning to me- to claim that all gains made for women were made by Radical Feminists, and then to wing on about how so very, very grateful we unappreciative ‘convicts’  should be?  Seriously, Sister, Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?

None of us, not one single woman out there owes you or anyone else anything.  Jack and Shit, sister, is what we owe you.  If you were a damn corporation, trust me, the board of directors would have served your head up on a plate a long time ago because yer business practices suck eggs and offend the consumer population base- regardless of demographic!  And then you write this cute little tirade about how ungrateful women are after all your hard work…you want a thank you?

I’m afraid a fuck you is gonna have to suffice.

Officer, I am done with my attorney, take me back to my damn cell.

 

“vs”

Posted: October 27, 2009 in Humans, Pornography, Sex

Okay, there are two now.   The second one I read this morning after making my Oh FFS post about the night my dude friends living room became Sparta and you what, I’ll admit it… I laughed.  And not in a ha-ha funny way but in a “wow, I obviously live on a totally different planet than these women live on” way. 

I have come to the conclusion that such things must be absolutely true.  I am not sure which is planet earth or whatnot, but yep, totally different planets.  Granted, most of these women would prolly not be in a dudes living room when it turned into Sparta, or in some cases, at all, but hey, stick with me here…

I’ve never been quiet or shy about my thought that sex and aggression can be linked, to varying degrees, with some people.  Some a lot more than others.  I fall into the “more often than not” category.  I tend to view sex as a sweaty, physical, primal, visceral thing  (not “dirty”, but certainly all those words I just mentioned).  I tend to think it is best when it is aggressive.  I dig that.  And my like of that sort of thing is notable and prevalent in any form of pornographic/erotic material I make; be it art, fictional writing, or yep, good old porn.  The “vs” theme is rampant.   But you know…

I don’t always see or have the female as the one who is defeated?  I rather like things to be a win/win situation in that regard.  Now, if you are of the mindset (as many of the women over there seem to be) that whoever ends up with a penis in them is the person who lost….well then…I am not sure what to tell you.  If one views that as a sure sign of defeat….well, then we really, really are not from the same planet.  I am sort of in the mindset that if the objective of the “fight” was sex, then the penis in them part actually is a sign of victory since well, that was part of the point in the end- to have sex (the het PiV kind, which is well, what I like, so what I put forth in my erotic/porny things).    Hell, I mean anyone who has ever read the Martell stuff…shit, just because she often ends up with a penis in her, Zero is hardly an oft-defeated little victim now, is she? 

And since I have determined that I am not from the same planet as these women, I will add the following.  In all the “horrific” things mentioned over there where the women are so obviously just being defeated…dp, gangbangs, gagging…whatever….well, it is evident that the thought that no woman could ever welcome or enjoy that sort of a physical challenge is the rule of the day.  No thought that a woman, after having engaged in all that, might stand up, smirk, and say “You threw your best at me and I am still standing whilst you all are sucking wind with cramps and just want to go to sleep.”  Endurance factors in not at all when considering victory in “versus”.  Outwit and Outlast are apparently reserved only for “Survivor”.   And me, I guess, but hey, it is obvious I am not from the same planet. 

Then again, in their defence, these women so alien unto me….well, one of the things the Patriarchy-as it were- has thrown at women for a long time is they are not supposed to be aggressive or competitive, especially with men.  When it comes to that- well, I think a certain Tool There Of has done far better in shaking off that message Than Various Others Have.   I’ll be aggressive and competitive with whomever I like so long as they consent to it, thanks.

And yeah, I do think it is hot.  Even when I don’t “win”….I still win. 

But of course there is no possible way any other woman out there could ever agree with me on that, right?

So, once again, not about feminism, but rather sex and sex work.  The debate continues on at ND’s, and in it, Faith has become pretty insistent that sex workers do not have a wider range of experiences (as in odd, strange, more straight forward, kinky, whatever) than non-sexworker women…

And I have to say sorry, but I really freakin’ disagree there.  Hell, I run with a twisted and pervy bunch of women, but still…I just think she is flat out wrong on that one.

See, there are a lot of men who specifically seek out sex workers for various fantasies and fetishes because they are either embarrassed to ask their partners about them, know their partners will not go for them, do not wish to be judged for having them, and figure that hey, that being the case, hire a professional.    Also, I think something that is forgotten here is yeah, perhaps younger men, 20-30 somethings and all, might not have too hard of a time finding a partner willing to try out their kinks (many of them anyway), but older guys?  Not so much really.   Society has become less conservative and many people have embraced that…other generations?  Not so much.  An older guy might not feel as though he can find someone to get his kink on with even more so than a younger guy might…so once again, a professional is called in.

And I am just sorta sitting here smirking about it.  Because you know, it isn’t a competition.  If people are happy in their own sex lives, what the hell does in matter how good/bad/diverse/strange/more experienced/less experienced they are than sex workers?  Its almost like the silly meme of Non Sex Workers saying “omg, we have better sex and are a better at sex than sex workers” and sex workers saying “honey, you ain’t got a fucking clue”…  I mean for real, who cares?  If a woman is happy in her fucking, what does it matter?

But see, it is the oddity that gets me.  It’s just odd to me to think that non-sexworkers figure they see as much of the weird and strange of human kinks and fetishes that sex workers see because people specifically go to sex workers to experience these things.  How many dudes go to pro-dommes with all their strange and personalized fantasies because their partners are not into it?  How many guys go to prostitutes because they want to do things their girlfriend/wife  is not down with?  How many people hire professionals because they can’t seem to find amateurs to kink out with?  Answer:  Lots. 

I mean, in my day, I have seen some weird shit.  Guys who will pay to be beaten up (and I mean seriously beaten up), trampled, pissed on, puked on, have their body hair ripped out, demeaned, degraded, humiliated, forced to lick out toilet bowls, anally fisted, roleplay out rape fantasies with another dude, jacked with a cattle prod, pierced, choked, wrapped up almost completely in Saran Wrap and kicked in the nuts.  Guys who want a sex worker to sit in cold water and ice then play dead.  Guys who want to rough up the professional, piss on, slap, hair pull and play out rape fantasies with her.  Guys who want to play the dead body part.  Dudes who want to wear diapers.  Dudes who want to pretend to be schoolboys.  Dudes who want to pretend to be women, or prisoners, or animals.  Dudes who want to lick your feet or anus for an hour…or just listen to you talk about all the other weird requests you get. 

And yeah, I am sure there are non sex worker people out there in real life who engage in or have experienced some or more of these fetishes….but all of them?  Sometimes fairly regularly?

For some reason, I think not.   And people are gonna have a hard time convincing me otherwise.

Hummm…

Posted: September 28, 2009 in Sex, Sex Work

So, I was over reading at ND’s and in a post about feminist stuff and sex worker stuff there is a side thread that is now actually a bit more about sex than sex work or feminism, and I am ignoring the whole feminism bit to talk about things I prefer to talking about feminism, namely sex work and sex.  Yeah, me and my one track mind.

Anyhoo, over there, Faith made this comment, and it got me thinking.  Now yep, sure enough, there are a lot of women out there who are not sex workers who have vast and rich sexual histories and experiences and have great sex lives and all that stuff.  No question.  But when one thinks of “the statistical average woman” (as if there were such a thing, but stay with me here) and then lines that person up with a sex worker (who actually has sex as part of their sex working), I gotta say, I do think most of the time chances are that the sex worker has probably had more sex than the S.A. Woman.  Not necessarily good or fun sex, but sex. 

I mean, I run with a pretty freaky crowd y’all.  Wonderful pervy folk and whatnot.  However, be that as it may, even with swinger gals and stuff like that?  Um, yeah, most of the sex workers who have sex as part of their job that I know?  The number of people they have had sex with and the different/kinky/whatever things they have done?  Usually higher.  I mean, come on, many sex workers will see more clients in a day or have sex with more men in  a single porn scene or whatever….eh, screw it…a sex worker might fuck more dudes in a couple of hours than a great many women fuck in a year or their entire lifetimes.  It may not be awesome sex, but it is sex.  I honestly just don’t think most non-sexworker women are gonna rate that high in the partner count….I have a hard time imagining it, really.

As for the sex workers having “better” sex or being more in tune with pleasure and all, I am not sure on that one.  At all.  I know sex workers who have no private sex life because when one does that for a living, they just don’t want to for fun.   But for me though, you know,  I think it absolutely has helped me figure out what I like and don’t like and what pleases my body and what doesn’t.  And while I am still greedy as hell when it comes to my selfish orgasms and all- well, you can’t be in sex work without learning a few things about pleasing other people….so yeah, I think it has made me “better” at sex and made sex more enjoyable for me in so much as I absolutely know what I like and what works for me.  I do absolutely think people can learn that in other non-sex working ways- but yep, for me…definately. 

Hell, my biggest problem is finding people who are into what I am into.  They don’t actually grow on trees, surprisingly enough.