So, I did a lot of thinking before I decided to write this post…been sorta waiting around for input from folks I’d asked opinions of and shit like that, but I ain’t heard back and am tired of waiting around for responses that may or may not ever come…which is a whole different rant in the making I suppose. I dunno, when folk solicit my opinion or advice about something they want to write, I try to get back to them in a timely fashion…hell, I try to be timely and responsible in general…but I gotta stop holding other folk to the standards I try to keep up myself, ’cause that shit just lends itself to being disappointed…and shit, currently due to my dang back, I can’t be as active or timely or whatever as I’d like to be…so I suppose the same shit happens to other people too.
Anyway, moving on, let’s talk some more about drugs, shall we? The reason I agonized and thought long and hard about making this post at all is because hey, I’m gonna discuss my own shit here, which may explain to some degree my opinions on my other drug posts! Imagine that? In any event, here we go, drugs and such, through the personal lense and all that.
In my day, I have done my fair share of them. It’s kinda funny because I did not do anything, including drinking and smoking cigarettes and whatnot, until I was in college. That’s right, no booze, no weed, none of that craziness until I was pretty dang close to legal. Heck, one of my grin and say it sayings has been “there is a time and a place for everything, and it is called college” for a long time. Once in college, and for a few years after that, I tried and did a lot of shit…the kind of experimentation I think a lot of late teen to mid-twenties types do. I smoked weed, tried things like acid, ecstasy and mushrooms, I drank, tried coke, did speed, smoked opium once, and even one and one time only, tried heroin. And I can tell ya, I had no desire to ever try that shit again. As I got older my curiosity about anything and everything faded, I’d tried a lot of shit and figured out what I liked, and I learned that the stuff I liked? Well, best to be careful with it, because I liked it…and liking any drug too much is just asking for trouble. I’ve known, I know, I’ve seen, and I see enough folk who were addicts, or addicts, or struggle endlessly with addiction to know that it’s not a place I ever want to find myself. That doesn’t mean however that I did not occasionally use drugs casually, and sure enough, I still do from time to time. Heck, I’m on prescribed pain killers currently (which can be fun, but you know, I have those for a reason-that reason being pain) but sometimes, life calls for a little something extra or different…and sure enough, I will occasionally allow myself that.
So yeah, what is that extra I sometimes allow myself anyway? I’m sure friends and foes alike are dying to know and shit (heh). Once in a long, long while I will smoke weed, but it’s not now nor has it ever been my thing. I think I last took acid about 12 years ago…been longer since I had ecstasy or almost everything else really. But when I do indulge, well, like all folk who use-occasionally or more than occasionally- I have my favorite. And you can cringe or whatever if you want, but yep, sure enough, I like speed, and my favorite form there of, well, yeah, its meth. I like it. I rarely do it because I like it, but if I’m going to use something…that will be it. Heck, there is a reason I can write convincing fiction about people who use it…because I know how it is when you do…from the sweating to the teeth grinding to everything else.
And yes, I do realize the oddity of it all; I’m by nature a tightly wound, insomnia having, teeth grinding, overly wired wee ball of C4 in a skinsuit…in short the last person on earth who should like or want to do any kind of speed, much less that kind…but well, I do.
And before anyone says shit, no, I never used it when working, actually. Being a sweaty teeth grinding jittery ball of tweeker joy is NOT good for business in my business…if I’m gonna do it, I prefer to be in my basement with my television and power tools and computer and lots of soda and cigarettes, thanks!
So why did I decide to Name My Poison anyway? I guess cause I feel like if I am gonna talk about drugs, I might as well talk about them. As for people who are gonna lie and talk shit? Well, can’t stop them from doing it anyway, so who really gives a fuck, right?