Terms I hate…

Posted: August 3, 2011 in Blogging

so, since I mentioned one in a comment before, I am just gonna lay it out.  Sure, i swear a lot and all, but there are a couple words/terms I hate and don’t wanna see on my blog- ever.  They include:

Pussy- in any reference, be it a cat, a vagina, or a wimp.

Milf- Just, ick, no, leave that one at home.

“Selling your self”:  That phrase must die by fire, thank you.

 

That is all.

 

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Comments
  1. dead_vladimir says:

    why the hate on selling yourself–you have to sell yourself in job interviews, etc.

    • Ren says:

      because of how its used in reference to sex workers and such. if the term was used EQUALLY and with the SAME CONNOTATIONS towards anyone and everyone business wise, might hate it less, but its not.

  2. rootietoot says:

    I had an Australian friend visit a while back, and she saw my cat and went “here pussy pussy” and wondered why I laughed. I told her. Later on she looked shocked when I told the boys to sit on their fanny, and she explained that “fanny” was their term for…um….y’know…(pussy).

    • Ren says:

      sigh, my great grandmother’s name was Fanny. No wonder she was a tough hard drinkin’ broad who lived to be 100….

    • True story: In my early-to-mid teens, I always thought “fanny pack” was a more appropriate term than “bum bag”, because most people I saw wore them to the front, where one’s fanny would be located. It was ages until I realised that in US slang, “fanny pack” is a direct translation of British slang words “bum” and “bag”.

  3. chamblee54 says:

    There is more to respecting a person than not using forbidden words.
    I was going through a collection of links the other night, and decided to drop by. It is good to see that you are still in the game.
    chamblee54

  4. joankelly6000 says:

    I won’t use the p-word on your blog, but for some reason it gives me pleasure to call a room full of men a bunch of fucking p-words. I don’t know why that specifically is enjoyable for me, but it is. I do like it when people express clear boundaries though! 🙂

    • rootietoot says:

      The problem (as I see it) with calling men p-words is that by doing so you’re implying they’re weak and helpless, and yet, what is farther from weak and helpless than a body part that can squeeze out multiple watermelon-sized human beings and smile about it afterwards, then 6 weeks later be back in shape and ready to go again? it don’t make no sense.

      • joankelly6000 says:

        agreed, rootie, to everything you say, it’s why I wish it didn’t feel so satisfying to me to call men that, but I have not found (perhaps it’s laziness on my end, in all seriousness) a word that is as satisfying as “you fucking pussies!”, said to a room full of grown men who are trying to bully five-foot-nuthin’ me. Trying and failing, I might add.

        but simultaneously, I’m with you and Ren and especially since I love that body part on women – my own, others’, etc. although I will admit to being surprised about the idea that smiles naturally follow chlid-birth – I’ve known a couple of people who were in agony after, which to me only stands to reason, cute watermelon-sized creature coming out of the deal or not.

        My point being, I’m on a muscle relaxant because my left shoulder/arm is on fire and I can’t sleep during the pain, nor can I stop babbling once I’m up.

        I want to feel how you and Ren both feel – that it’s a fucked up word to use in a derogatory way, for all the reasons you mention, and then just not do so. Knowing that it bothers men as much as it does, when I’m being bullied, makes it my go-to insult for men sometimes. I did manage to remove the word “bitch” from my daily vocabulary for personal reasons years ago, so I believe it’s possible with “pussy” too. Thanks for your comment (and Ren, for this post).

        I do have a linguistics/thoughts-on-the-subject question if anyone feels like answering – and I want to affirm ahead of time that it’s not about finding a way to acceptably say “pussy,” for me. I’m either going to say it or I’m not, obviously, with or without the approval of blog friends, etc,

        Question is: Do you believe it’s possible for words to have both good and bad associations, and as such could serve a purpose by not-doing-away-with-it? I’m sorry I will be so convoluted here – what I mean is, do you think it’s possible and acceptable for words to mean more than one thing, and not have to be disqualified or qualified based on one of its negative connotations because of that?

        One thing I’m thinking of is “gay.” In middle school, we didn’t think “ew, homosexual!” or anything of the sort when we said something was “gay.” We really solely meant “ugh, that *so* makes-me-look/feel/seem not-cool by association.” And I still love using that word, that way. I don’t honestly know whether I think it’s okay to use it, around people who know my meaning, or if I believe the politics about how once a word has any negative connotation attached to it at all, that’s it, it’s done-for.

        Because words have meaning, and context often changes meaning, I tend to come down on the side of “it depends on when/where/how/who” etc.

        But with “pussy” for the record, I don’t think there’s a way to use it negatively and have it be removed from a negative connotation about vagina, the way I think “gay” can be divorced from meaning homosexual-slur. I mean, gay meant happy before it meant same-sex love, for example.

        Anyway, muscle relaxant-ramble over, thank you for reading and for your comments.

        • Ren says:

          “Do you believe it’s possible for words to have both good and bad associations, and as such could serve a purpose by not-doing-away-with-it? I’m sorry I will be so convoluted here – what I mean is, do you think it’s possible and acceptable for words to mean more than one thing, and not have to be disqualified or qualified based on one of its negative connotations because of that?”

          Hells yes I think so. Take, for instance, the word “fuck”. I am a FAN of this word, and believe it has both good and bad associations. For instance, fucking in the sexual sense: Yay, I am a fan. Yet, then if I am, oh, pissed off and tell some one “I am going to fuck you up” not necessarily so joyous and well, its a threat. There is also the whole “getting fucked up” ala booze or drugs, and it can be good OR bad….it truly IS a multi-purpose word with lots of uses 🙂

        • rootietoot says:

          joan, I am impressed with yout ability to think while on muscle relaxers. All I can do when on them is watch leftovers of Star Trek and drool on my pillow.
          Yes to the double connotations. Language is a fluid thing, always evolving. Being rigid and of (mostly) Scottish heritage, therefore lacking the ‘humor’ gene, when I see someone using a term in a way that is contradictory, I have a need to call them out on it. However, also having an Armenian great-great grandmother who gave me more than just the ability to tan, I can see a perspective different from my own and not automatically consider it wrong (well, ok at first I might, but eventually will see your point). So, the point it that I do NOT approve of people using ‘pussy’ to imply someone is weak (and yes,I smiled and even laughed when all 4 pink watermelon-sized babies were flopped onto my chest, and was ready to go again in 6 weeks) nor do I like it when one of my kids says “that’s so gay”. I will ask them (to their irritation) “in what way? Is it happy or do you mean that is it sexually attracted to the same gender? You just called that truck ‘gay’…since when do trucks have gender and sexual attraction? Explain yourself” which of course irritates the snot out of them, and that’s entirely my intention.
          I’m not asking for the current lexicon to be entirely static. I am aware that language is constantly changing, I am simply wanting for people to think about what they’re saying before they say it, and consider the definition of the words they use.
          I’m not good with word based insults…but then I have Laser Eyes and a lovely derisive snort that gets the message across.

          Oh and another thing that will piss me off quicker than Milf or pussy (those are just thoughtless and crude)- calling someone a breeder. *THAT* will get you a rant, because it’s plain nasty.

          • joankelly6000 says:

            Well Rootie, while I’d love to bask in the glory of seeming super-human with my functionality on muscle relaxants, it’s a result of negative stuff more than positive. I keep saying it’s that I have the tolerance level of a linebacker, but actually I don’t think it’s the same thing as tolerance-having; I think it’s that I am so used to feeling things like pain (migraines for example – I can function while having them unless they are super fucking bad ones) and feeling things like “high” (from being a former drug addict rather than pain-management type of user) that my body and brain just take a lot more to be laid-out than others’ I guess. Anyhoo, thanks for the un-earned-on-my-end being impressed with me thing, ha.

            And I agree with and (I think) understand your points about confronting the usage of different words in specific contexts where people may not even be intentionally aiming for hurtfulness but may simply be being intellectually and/or emotionally lazy. I think sometimes that’s true about the way I have used or may ever again use “gay,” and sometimes not, but I will say that I’d much prefer to think of or remember or invent a word that means what I mean when I use that word (gay) as more of an eye-rolling type of feeling, than a gay-means-homosexual-which-means-something-bad type of feeling. Mainly because I simply don’t have the latter feelings.

            Re: “breeder” – I don’t know if it’s because I’ve never had kids and never wanted to, or because I’m partially an emotional robot, or what, but I’ve never had a reaction one way or the other to that word being used, especially by gay people about straight people (which is the only way I’ve ever heard it used – maybe other people use it too?, but I haven’t personally heard it from straight people aimed at other straight people).

            Is it too personal or button-pushy for me to ask if I’m correct in my only guess about why you find it offensive – that it sounds like comparing humans to animals (as in, the way animals are “bred” to have certain traits or etc.)? It’s not that I don’t understand why it’s offensive to you and so feel like you owe an explanation because otherwise it’s silly, it’s that I like to understand things, and this is something that is going over my head, I feel like. So thanks ahead of time, if you feel like taking the time to explain.

            • rootietoot says:

              Joan-I have no problem explaining ‘breeder’, or anything else you might ask. I am offended by it because of the comparison of humans to animals- exactly like you said. It’s as if I didn’t give any thought to having children, that I’m just popping out babies mindlessly because I think it’s the only reason I exist. I would NEVER criticize someone who chose not to have children, I don’t think they’re weird or selfish or anything of the sort- therefore someone who criticizes my decision by calling me names is offensive. I’ve never been called that by homosexuals-at least not the ones I know- (tho I have heard that it happens) but rather by radical feminists/academics who see my whole lifestyle as an affront to theirs. It pisses me off when people automatically assume that a perspective or lifestyle different from their own is a default criticism of their choices. Yes, I am a Christian housewife-mother-of-4-suburban-dwelling white woman with a high school education. That does not mean an automatic condemnation of childless urban dwelling homosexual academics, or anyone else (except pedophiles and pimps…I have a REAL problem with anyone who uses or victimizes others). It simply means that I have made lifestyle decisions that suit me, and to imply that I am a mindless cow by calling me a breeder is deeply offensive.

              And let me offer empathy for your pain. I understand chronic pain, and how it’s possible to push it to the back of your mind and carry on. That doesn’t mean it’s happy-happy-joy-joy. All I can say is ‘thank God for pharmaceuticals”. 18 years of daily doses have kept me in one piece,and mighty grateful I am for them. I hope you get to feeling better soon.

              • Ren says:

                there CAN be some serious racistclassist connotation to the term breeder as well….

              • I hate “breeder” too, and I’m queer. It’s inaccurate when all you know about someone is that she’s hetero (lots of het people do all kinds of things to KEEP FROM breeding, and it’s a big part of many of their sexual lives) and… just generally sketchy gross.

              • joankelly6000 says:

                Thanks, Rootie, for the answer and for the empathy. I’m actually feeling better slowly but surely, and though I too am a fan of pharmaceuticals when I need them, I think of all things it’s the ibuprofen that’s been helping my shoulder the most. I’m always afraid to take it because it often hurts my stomach, but my doctor said “anti-inflammatory’s your best bet” and I trust him so I’m trying ibuprofen on as full of a stomach as I can muster each time, and so far it’s less shoulder pain, not much stomach pain. Yay. I would add an exclamation point if it weren’t 3am and I weren’t so tired. 😛

                Also, Ren, I saw your other more recent post, and haven’t had a chance to read comments there or formulate my own ideas into more responses at my own blog too, but I hope to soon.

          • Xena says:

            George Takei was all over the net a few months back with his “don’t say gay, say Takei” campaign, complete with a little pastel Trekkie combadge to get the point across. Look him up. Your kids might enjoy what he has to say. He has a great sense of humor. How about sticking one of those little pastel chevrons to that ” so Takei” toy truck?

      • Roy Kay says:

        Yeah, but It makes a great rejoinder to “You are what you eat.” / “I guess than makes me a pussy.”

  5. dead_vladimir says:

    how about “but i just went to that website because i’m a big Billy Joel fan”

  6. This is what I get for not browsing here so much…ugh.

    Personally, I’m equally as much against using the “P-bomb” outside of simply describing that particular body part, because it tends to insult that particular body part. I don’t consider it to be particularly weak, myself…so why the hell use it to smack down a “weak” man??? And yes, I feel the same way about the other “bombs” used against that particular portion of a woman’s anatomy, too. (Though, I have to admit it…”twat” as an occasional putdown is entertaining.

    But, Ren…I’m sure that the MRA wacks will simply respond with: “OK, so when are you going to get equally incensed with men being called ‘dicks’ and ‘dickheads’?” Reducing people to their sex bits in order to put them down is indeed a cross-gender experience, you know.

    That’s the main reason I still prefer “asshole” though: it’s gender neutral, and it gets to the point rather quickly.

    Anthony

    • rootietoot says:

      I use “asshole” on a regular basis, whether describing a person or fussing at a recalcitrant piece of machinery. In fact, I am fond of any sort of scatalogically based curse…shithead, asshole, duck turd…you name it. Shocks the shit outa my preacher’s wife, but I maintain that for a Christian, it’s preferable to condemning someone or something to perdition,since that’s not my call to make.

      • Xena says:

        Yes, I prefer combining animal words with poopy terms when I’m giving someone shit too. Then I throw in a liberal dose of the f word: “fuckin dogfuckin piece of shit little puke…” My rants almost sound like chants, and they sometimes last for 3 and 4 minutes at a stretch.

        You might get a chuckle over this: I try to avoid blasphemy because it makes me sound like a hypocrite. If you want to pick it apart, “go to hell” might as well be “go to Hogwart’s” or “go to Mordor” for all the disbelief I throw around. I guess you could say it’s not my call to make either. Like sucking up to some other authority figure–take your pick–a cop or bureaucrat I’ve always disliked just because one of his underlings annoys me and things are …well, shitty. That would be kinda cowardly, imo.

  7. On an email list I’m on (actually, one I tried long long ago to leave and can’t seem to unsub from, otherwise I would have made a whole shitload of noise, as I’m sure you can guess I would 😉 ) someone posted a link to an article about young women paying for college by finding sugar daddies online, and the poster was all “How sad that these girls are selling themselves to get an education!”

    Yep, if I weren’t in the middle of TRYING TO LEAVE BECAUSE THEIR SHIT MAKES ME CRAZY I would have gone the hell off. So gross. Ew.

    And I don’t like the p-word much either. I like the thing, but it’s the most unsexy word for it.. ugh. Can’t stand it when dykes use that word for it and blink at me when I don’t. LADIES, JUST SAY CUNT. 😛

    • Xena says:

      I admit it. I used the p-word and the c-word the other night. I got some exercise when this punkass kid gave me attitude. I called him on and his cupcake jumped on me, Jerry springer style. The rest was pure asses and elbows, horizontal-on-concrete cathissing entertainment pleasure. I gouged the bitch’s eyes!!

      I was a little pissed that he wouldn’t raise his own hand to me, hence the use of the nasty word. If I were sure he was of age, I would have beat him anyway, but the best I could do was mess up his girlfriend’s face and call him nasty names. I am SO not about to go to jail for taking the first shot at some underage puke! KIDS THESE DAYS!!

      • Ren says:

        lol yep, if they aint legal, you gotta let em hit you first…. Learned that the hard way…

        • Xena says:

          Really? You went down for scrappin with a minor? I hope that was funny, not shitty for you.

          Speaking of terms some people hate, how was Slutwalk? I SO wanted to go. I could have jumped the border and thumbed down, but I don’t have a passport. And without cash for a room, well… I’m imagining all kinds of ugly run-ins with cops and immigration people, especially after that scrap. In my hometown, it’s one thing. But cops and scraps in a different country? Uh-uh. 😦

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