Name your Poison

Posted: March 15, 2011 in Drugs & Rock n Roll, Personal

So, I did a lot of thinking before I decided to write this post…been sorta waiting around for input from folks I’d asked opinions of and shit like that, but I ain’t heard back and am tired of waiting around for responses that may or may not ever come…which is a whole different rant in the making I suppose.  I dunno, when folk solicit my opinion or advice about something they want to write, I try to get back to them in a timely fashion…hell, I try to be timely and responsible in general…but I gotta stop holding other folk to the standards I try to keep up myself, ’cause that shit just lends itself to being disappointed…and shit, currently due to my dang back, I can’t be as active or timely or whatever as I’d like to be…so I suppose the same shit happens to other people too.

Anyway, moving on, let’s talk some more about drugs, shall we?  The reason I agonized and thought long and hard about making this post at all is because hey, I’m gonna discuss my own shit here, which may explain to some degree my opinions on my other drug posts!  Imagine that?  In any event, here we go, drugs and such, through the personal lense and all that.

In my day, I have done my fair share of them.  It’s kinda funny because I did not do anything, including drinking and smoking cigarettes and whatnot, until I was in college.  That’s right, no booze, no weed, none of that craziness until I was pretty dang close to legal.  Heck, one of my grin and say it sayings has been “there is a time and a place for everything, and it is called college” for a long time.  Once in college, and for a few years after that, I tried and did a lot of shit…the kind of experimentation I think a lot of late teen to mid-twenties types do.  I smoked weed, tried things like acid, ecstasy and mushrooms, I drank, tried coke, did speed, smoked opium once, and even one and one time only, tried heroin.  And I can tell ya, I had no desire to ever try that shit again.  As I got older my curiosity about anything and everything faded, I’d tried a lot of shit and figured out what I liked, and I learned that the stuff I liked?  Well, best to be careful with it, because I liked it…and liking any drug too much is just asking for trouble.  I’ve known, I know, I’ve seen, and I see enough folk who were addicts, or addicts, or struggle endlessly with addiction to know that it’s not a place I ever want to find myself.  That doesn’t mean however that I did not occasionally use drugs casually, and sure enough, I still do from time to time.  Heck, I’m on prescribed pain killers currently (which can be fun, but you know, I have those for a reason-that reason being pain) but sometimes, life calls for a little something extra or different…and sure enough, I will occasionally allow myself that.

So yeah, what is that extra I sometimes allow myself anyway?  I’m sure friends and foes alike are dying to know and shit (heh).  Once in a long, long while I will smoke weed, but it’s not now nor has it ever been my thing.  I think I last took acid about 12 years ago…been longer since I had ecstasy or almost everything else really.  But when I do indulge, well, like all folk who use-occasionally or more than occasionally-  I have my favorite.  And you can cringe or whatever if you want, but yep, sure enough, I like speed, and my favorite form there of, well, yeah, its meth.  I like it.   I rarely do it because I like it, but if I’m going to use something…that will be it.  Heck, there is a reason I can write convincing fiction about people who use it…because I know how it is when you do…from the sweating to the teeth grinding to everything else.

And yes, I do realize the oddity of it all;  I’m by nature a tightly wound, insomnia having, teeth grinding, overly wired wee ball of C4 in a skinsuit…in short the last person on earth who should like or want to do any kind of speed, much less that kind…but well, I do.

And before anyone says shit, no, I never used it when working, actually.  Being a sweaty teeth grinding jittery ball of tweeker joy is NOT good for business in my business…if I’m gonna do it, I prefer to be in my basement with my television and power tools and computer and lots of soda and cigarettes, thanks!

So why did I decide to Name My Poison anyway?  I guess cause I feel like if I am gonna talk about drugs, I might as well talk about them. As for people who are gonna lie and talk shit?  Well, can’t stop them from doing it anyway, so who really gives a fuck, right?

  1. hexy says:

    But hey… meth sex. Fuck yeah. Amirite?

    • Ren says:

      You know, never actually HAD that…i tend to take shit apart and build shit and that sorta thing….mostly cause I do it by myself with no other humans around.

      • hexy says:

        I tend to talk. A LOT. And then shag like a crazy monkey.

        My drug of choice has always been ecstasy, to a bit of a damaging extreme. Meth’s OK. I find it a little boring, but at the same time uncomfortably moreish. I’ll hoover up whatever we’ve got and then demand more.

  2. rootietoot says:

    I’ve never tried anything except smoking pot twice, and it did NOTHING for me so I figured ‘why bother’. no coke, no nothing else. Especially not hallucinogens…my mind can do that all on it’s own.
    HOWEVER, I do love me some prescriptions. And booze. Sometimes even together, when I’m in a dark, dark mania and likely to kill someone. They make me mellow and laughy. The only time I get all Churchlady Disapproving about drugs is when the user gets destructive. (of other people, I really don’t care what they do to themselves unless it’s one of my kids, then I reserve the right to call them Dumbass)

  3. Mr.Grim says:

    I would have in the past considered myself as a professional party guy. Much older and wiser now, I think that I was very lucky with the amount of stuff that I did. The only drug that I did not do was H. I have not used anything in years, but I still know people who do. For the most part I tend to avoid being around drugs now. I DONT judge people who do, I just know my limitations as someone who has an intense and addictive personality.

  4. Gaina says:

    I am a total control freak (an addiction in itself? Sometimes I do wonder…) and alcohol exacerbates the lack of co-ordination I already have so the closest I get to partying is a glass of wine at christmas.

    I really appreciate a refreshingly honest discussion about drugs like this. I really do think the reason a lot of young people get into trouble with their drug use is that it’s always discussed via judgmental language that suggests ‘forbidden fruit’, instead of in a matter-of-fact way that doesn’t patronize current or potential users.

    I had a friend in college who was a former heroine addict and became a drugs counselor who spoke about drugs and their side effects in the same matter-of-fact, non judgmental way that you do. He had more success in helping younger members of my class decide that they didn’t fancy drugs or that they might want to stop taking them than any scare-mongering ad campaign could!

  5. Can I say, hell’s yes, to the meth!?! I loved the euphoria, the staying up all night tweeking on whatever project caught my attention. Meth sex, yes plz!

  6. polly says:

    Gaina I agree. There is no point in telling (manifestly untrue) scare stories, all it does is destroy your credibility with anyone who is ever inclined to take any form of illlegal drug. If you say ‘take ecstasy once and you will die’ then all the potential ecstasy user will think is ‘well I know plenty of people who’ve taken it and they seem to still be unharmed’.

    The only illegal drug I bother with is weed. I don’t like the idea of altered states of consciousness because I used to have a form of epilepsy when I was younger that led to some pretty scary altered states. And I don’t like anything speedy because my aim of any drug use (apart from caffeine to keep me awake during boring days) is just to chill out and relax with friends. So my main drug of choice is alcohol.

  7. richy cairns says:

    im with u on the weedy thingy polly 🙂

  8. Joan Kelly says:

    aw hell, not that this was the point of your post but I *am* sorry I haven’t answered your email yet. I love that you even asked me – you can’t possibly know how much I loved it – and I’m sorry my cloudy brain made time for other stuff and didn’t get back to you first. not as an excuse but just so you know it isn’t and wasn’t anything like not-caring-about-you, my inbox is full of people who are more interesting and lovable other stuff I’ve decided to engage with since getting their emails. I’m telling you (I know, what will my excuse for scattered-ness be when I’m not on painkillers) though that I am not a good-thinker when I’m high, whether the high is medically sanctioned or not. I really do forget everything important (hence over-usage of my blackberry calendar) and zero in on nonsense when I’m in this state.

    That said, what I would have told you anyway was, I love that you and I both write so freely (or did anyway, not sure how much either of us has lately) about sex stuff, including perversion, but then are tentative about talking about drugs! not that you’d know it on my end, since it seems to be all I rattle on about lately, but I mean as a general topic, personal-relationship-to-substances-wise, I so relate to you feeling like talkign about it and wondering if you should.

    I’m going to read this post more thoroughly (really this is not just another drug-induced empty promise) and likely respond more, since from snippets I’ve seen, I already relate a lot, and also I will still answer any/all emails, even if it’s in a super tardy, makes-people-wonder-if-you-give-a-damn way. I do love you and I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings with that. Also, if my talking about the email thing is too personal for this post, please feel free to edit or delete this comment. I jsut wanted you to know, and since I read here more than I read my inbox lately, ha, figured I should take advantage of the moment of being here. xoxox

  9. Xena says:

    Hi all. I hope I’m not one of the people whose input you’ve been waiting for. March break. Homeless. Lineups for public gadgets. Sister and 18 year old daughter jobsearching. Stupid internet connection I can’t use when the phone’s plugged in for work callbacks. Yadayada. RL sux.

    Do I lie about my past drug experiments? Damn straight. Not only do I abstain from everything except cigarettes and coffee (that includes sex); I also don’t talk about ANYTHING that might expose me as whatever incubus-possessed civilization-destroying harbinger-of-the-apocalypse-thingie these church ladies are always trying to accuse unpartnered moms like myself of being. Sex work? I don’t partake. But I’m constantly being accused of it. People just don’t grasp how a woman who’s better looking than a 6 on that 1-10 looks scale can be in my position unless she brought it on herself. That includes my mom and her friends. They ask me some frikkin dumb questions sometimes.

    I’ll fess up here about what I’ve done, tho. I grew up po’. Yeah, that’s so poor we couldn’t afford the r. Ok, I grew up in a project built by the same people who designed the Canadian ghetto in Bowling For Colombine. Not half bad by global standards, I guess, but people there were as petty and mean as any American tv about smalltown trailer trash, minus the drive-bys. Strict gun control up here. Picture a backdrop like My Name Is Earl during the fun times, and Million Dollar Baby when shit got more serious. Dope was everywhere. There was nothing else for bored, poor teenagers to do, besides go to church. The lucky ones got into sports when they were young and got to play hockey all over Ontario and Michigan by high school. The rest of us fucked up and dropped out of high school. About half of my girlfriends married abusive losers and lived their movie-of-the-week lives on welfare until they were used up. Then they went on disability and raised the grandchildren the child protection people took from their kids, most of whom had also spent at least a year in foster care. Like I’ve already mentioned, our foster care system is idiotic. It’s the Residential School system all over again.

    So I had my first beer when I was 13. NASTY! Shortly thereafter, I discovered that I was allergic to most types of alcohol. Beer will make me yak or put me into convulsions after 2 or 3. I can sorta drink vodka, gin and whiskey, and I’m a super-cheap drunk–I see double after about 6–but OUCH! The hangovers! I’d really rather not. Southern comfort’s nice if I mix it with something fruity, and I can drink rum without too much grief, but again, I still get hangovers. It’s like Russian Roulette with those 2. I never know when the shit will blast me and when it won’t. I smoked weed through most of my teens and 20s, once or twice a month. My whole body changed again when I turned 28. Weed just makes me sleepy now. That’s fine if I need to be sleepy, but when people are sitting around getting red, they don’t really want you to be sleepy.

    I liked acid too. It was probably my favourite. But I need a safe happy place for it, and 8-18 hours to be high, and another 12 to sleep it off. Then I need another day to clean up the mess from the weird shit I do when I’m on it. I paint murals that look pretty groovy when I’m high. They’re not so pretty the next day. Then I’ll go through the cupboards, peel the wallpaper, talk to people and animals and spirit vortices that nobody else can see, dig for buried treasure, go swimming in the neighbours’ kiddie pools…you get the picture. I’m not allowed to do that stuff at my age. I miss it tho.

    On my tried it a couple of times list: blow (hated it–didn’t like the people around me either) heroin–loved it. I’ve never seen such pretty barf. I had no idea puking could feel so good. Unfortunately it cramped up my belly and bunged me up fo 3 days afterward. YUCK. Speed–not much different from blow, a little angrier, hated the people around me even more. They all reminded me of the psychobunny in Fritz the Cat. Same messed up eyes and everything. Meth. Bah. 6 hours of a high that wasn’t much better than rum with a hash chaser and 3 days of wanting to peel off my own skin. I couldn’t sleep for 72 hours. It was like the last 2 hours of an acid high, when you’re still kinda hallucinating, but everything’s dirty and ugly and you know the party’s over, but you’re still too wired to sleep. With meth THAT feeling lasted 72 frikkin hours!!

    Then there was crack. Luuurrrved. I used it to enhance my freaky sex experiments. Oh man o man… there is nothing in the world like doing a blast in the middle of some good lickie. Unfortunately, that little experiment killed me. For real. I flatlined and had to get jump started by a paramedic with heart paddles. It was my 3rd time. No more rock for me. I like my life, thank you.

    And all that before I got pregnant with my daughter at 19. (except the crack experiment–which happened when she was at grandma’s for the weekend–and my once-a-month dubies.) So, yeah, for the most part people will use their common sense when it comes to NOT ingesting something that makes them crazy.

    As for my voluntary celibacy–better to be alone than wish you were. Maybe I’m just (insert whatever modifiers here) picky, but getting offered $40 for sex and $100 for anal all the time is making me totally neurotic. ICK!! I thought people would stop the icky stereotyping when I got all matronly and went back to school to learn words like epistemologically privileged. Nope. They’re worse than ever. I’ve had enough freaky sex with beautiful young things for 10 people in my lifetime. I don’t need to start settling for creeps now. But if some sweet young cub made me an offer I couldn’t refuse, I’d take that poison again. Yeah, that would be my poison 🙂

  10. Xena says:

    I almost forgot: NO NEEDLES. SAFE SEX ONLY. I used a brand new hype for the speed experiment and even that made me durn paranoid. I started going for yearly HIV tests for the next decade. And THAT is what started the cycle of church lady ‘intervention’ that eventually got my housing and student loan subsidies pulled. They didn’t care how many negative piss tests and HIV tests I gave them. They were hell bent on finding a scapegoat to string up. So what…$75 000 in student loan debt plus interest compounded quarterly. Way to please the taxpayers. I’ll never be able to pay that now that they fucked up my chances of finishing my degree. Don’t godwin…don’t godwin…

    I am now 100% certain that I don’t have HIV or hep. And yet the rhetoric continues. The panic over diseases in ‘that type’–whatever ‘that type’ is in whatever historical context–is just a convenient way of keeping ‘that type’ from competing with the elites anyway. Fear of disease is also a convenient credibility killer. If an individual suffers harm as a result of being persecuted, getting called a crazy diseased drug addicted slut pretty much guarantees that no lawyer will even attempt a lawsuit for said slut, for fear of losing.

    But you all seem to know your Marx, your Chomsky, your Jim Crow laws, your McCarthyism, your post prohibition Hearst-ory. Throw the Malleus Maleficarum on to that pile and voila! It’s not just a conspiracy theory anymore. “Othering” through accusations of “possession” (addiction) and disease becomes a statistically provable human behaviour pattern.

    So for the liars and the people who talk shit–I don’t blame them. Hindsight being 20/20, I would have lied more often to protect my family, my GPA and my credit history from this. Be careful, Ren. It looks like your online haters don’t seep over into RL very often, so you’re probably safe enough being honest here. Just don’t try to be that honest with your face to face people. They could seriously fuck over your life.

    If I’m wrong about your online haters, delete this comment. Fast.

    • Ren says:

      my face to face RL people KNOW better. My sense of vengence is….legendary.

      (and that dirty mean ugly wired 72 hours…dude…that is the AWESOME part IMHO LOL)

      • Xena says:

        Really? I must be wired differently. I can’t deal with that 72 hour thing. It feels like another awful chemical hangover. It’s always the hangovers I can’t deal with.

        Vengeance would be great if I knew who lied to the people who pulled my subsidies in the first place. These problems can almost always be traced back to a nurse or a welfare worker. We have some messed up confidentiality loopholes in this province. Requests for HIV tests usually send up all the flags.

        The worst you’d probably have to deal with, not being on welfare, would be some Barney Fife type up in your grill with no power to do anything, right?

        • Ren says:

          I’m an insomniac naturally- being awake and dazed for long periods is old hat to me at this point.

          And I think a difference here in the states is, for the most part…people mind their own business. To a point. I mean yeah, everyone might KNOW your business,gossip about it, all that shit, but even to a point where its dangerous, no one wants to draw attention to themselves by “ratting someone out”. A person can get shot here in front of 25 people and “no one saw anything”….

          We have busybodies and all, but here, the busybody’s often know that saying shit to the law about certain types of people can land them at the undertakers.

          • Xena says:

            Yeah, rat codes here are the same in bigger cities like Toronto and Montreal and meaner cities like Vancouver and Winnipeg. Small town politics are fucked up tho.

    • rootietoot says:

      Wow, I am REALLY sorry you went through all that from churchladies. On behalf of churchladies who aren’t like that, I apologize. There’s alot they don’t know about me, as well. And I’m (supposedly) one of them.

  11. polly says:

    Well that’s true, I suppose, but I have noticed that people who claim to be christian are often singularly lacking in christian charity.

    There was a big fuss over here recently because a charity from the USA was offering drug users money to be sterilised/have contraceptive implants. I don’t see how any doctor with any kind of proper medical ethics could agree to carry out an irreversible operation with a huge impact on someone who was only doing it because they were desperate for money. And it wasn’t a huge amount of money, it was £200. Removing your capacity to have children for £200 doesn’t seem like informed consent to me.

  12. Stone Fox says:

    pretty brave there, lady, putting it all on the table 🙂

    i think i’m the odd one out here. i only ever tried marijuana, nothing else. too much vice and too many addicts in the family and truthfully, it scared me shitless as a kid and teenager. however, i’m fascinated by the idea that you take the occasional weekend and spend it on meth. why, out of curiosity? what prompts you to spend those few days in the basement smoking meth as opposed to a roadtrip, or hunting, or at the spa?

  13. Joan Kelly says:

    I definitely understand why you’ve made it a point to mention that you never did drugs (speed especially) while working, I would just like to say on the topic of drugs and the sex industry that I really kind of hope some people are on drugs while they do it. I get why the stereotype of the druggie whore is annoying to anyone who is in the industry and not a drug addict. I just hate that there is a stigma to something that honestly I don’t know how some people could do some things WITHOUT the assistance of consciousness-numbing substances. In other words, I don’t want anyone to have a drug dependency, just because that’s a miserable way to live for the most part, but I don’t think people should be judged for wanting or needing something to numb their senses when it comes to dealing close up with men’s balls. But maybe that’s just me.

    I have actually worked while on drugs before, not as a purposeful I’m-going-to-get-high-and-do-sessions, but sometimes planned sessions have coincided with my drug use. I take Xanax to fly, and some times I would get into NYC and have a last minute session pop up with one of my domme friends. (I didn’t plan sessions ahead of time for the night I got in just because I like to laze around and eat dinner and watch tv after a six hour flight myself.) But when I went to NYC this past February, I was on painkillers for migraines, and so was on drugs for all the sessions I did. I had planned the trip before the cause of the migraines had set in, so again, wasn’t like I thought “yay, drugs make sessions better let’s take drugs and plan sessions!”

    Painkillers make me more prone to crabbiness, in connection with sex stuff, so they don’t “help” in any sense of the word, for me. Xanax does make my pain tolerance higher, not that that’s an issue in the first place, but I used to do really heavy sessions with this one person, and if I saw him after flying in, I would just have a really disconnected feeling, like either I felt things less or cared almost-not-at-all. I don’t actually feel bad or good about that, though I can understand the view that it’s not healthy to disconnect from oneself and then be tortured by someone for money.

    I feel like anyone who can do any kind of drugs, illicit and otherwise, without ill effects to their lives or anyone else’s (like the lives of kids in their care, for instance), should do them as much as possible, ha. But seriously – I don’t understand why people who *can* do drugs, without self-destructing, and want to, wouldn’t just do them whenever they felt like it. I don’t know if that’s an addict/alcoholic way of looking at things or if most people see the logic in doing things that feel good whenever you can…

    The only thing in your post that I don’t feel happy about is just that you’re in ongoing pain and have been for the last few years, and so have had to be on painkillers, which is a really different experience than *wanting* to take them for fun sometimes. I hope that passes sooner or later, the chronic pain. Sooner, preferably. I’ve been dealing with chronic pain for the last 3 and a half months and it just is wearying. I’m grateful that mine has an end in sight.

    Somehow I’ve lucked into a life where none of the things I’ve ever done or might still do can cause me to get fired, disowned from my family, evicted, etc. I’m glad for that, but I wish it were the same for everyone. As long as you’re not hurting anyone, I don’t feel like it’s right that anyone should be penalized, on top of being judged, for drug use.

  14. Ren says:


    Well, I don’t smoke it. Snort it or eat it. But I guess I do it for the same reason a lot of folk do things-even ones that are bad for them- once in awhile. They Enjoy It. Other things like spa days or road trips, I like those too, but there are plenty of weekends /ree days in a year and truthfully, I have more fun doing those sorts of things with other people….but sometimes (often really) I am big on lone wolf don’t have to do with or be with or deal with other humans, and sometimes I like to do meth when I am doing that lone wolf thing. I enjoy it, and beleive it or not, I tend to get a lot of shit done; from silly shit like playing video games to serious shit like scrubbng baseboards and fixing things. Some people take a couple days and go to Atlantic City and gamble, some people hit the bars with their buddies, some people do all kinds of shit to indulge or kick back or whatever. I once in awhile Tweek Out.

    • rootietoot says:

      I’m that way with alcohol. Tho it doesn’t make me productive, quite the opposite, but I plan days in advance, make sure i have what I’ll want (mmm ginger vodka), and see to it any people who would need tending to are being tended at someone else’s house. And then…I have fun, be irresponsible, and take full advantage of the loosening of behavioral standards.

      • Ren says:

        Nods. Yep. I know its actually NOT a great thing to do, but sometimes, I just feel like “dammit, I’ve earned a bit of time to do something that I want to do, seen to anything that needs to be taken care of, isolated myself from those who would be affected negatively by my state…and now I’m gonna have some fun.”

        Not for everyone, obviously…but meh, not out there telling other folk to do it either.

        • rootietoot says:

          Those of us who keep very tight control over our lives NEED to be able to relinquish it sometimes. And no, not for everyone, but not going to say “YOU BAD” either, especially if you *are* able to control it. While the idea of meth use worries me (thanks to the propaganda), I am sure the number of liquor bottles in my recycling bin would give someone pause as well.

  15. Ren says:

    gahhh, that was me even, I forgot to login to my own dang blog, and nah, I’m not high!

  16. DebSens says:

    God, I am boring! I have only done pot once and only coughed on the bong, but I do like booze…Magic Mushrooms would be interesting to try but since they are illligal I have no idea where to get them. I always here so many scare stories and I end up not experamenting because I am extremly cautious…..

    • hexy says:

      I’m kinda a poly (ab)user. There are few drugs I don’t like. Well, G. I fucking hate G.

      I’ve become a bit of a nana these days, though. I don’t indulge very often… gotta be good to my brain.

      • rootietoot says:

        The brain is why I won’t use them. not out of a sense of preciousness, but because mine’s already tooky enough. Mind altering drugs tend to alter mine WAY more than most, and that scares the snot out of me. My liver, however, is another matter.

        • hexy says:

          This is why I rarely use ecstasy any more. My period of over indulgence in my teens left me a little worse for wear, and I’m fairly certain my mental health issues today wouldn’t be as bad if I hadn’t gone through that. Live and learn, I guess.

          Meth, surprisingly enough, leaves me feeling BETTER after a bender. I experience a couple of days of having my depression alleviated. I know a couple of other bipolar people who say the same thing, even though most people seem to have a bit of a downer after indulging. Brains are weird.

          • DebSens says:

            Just out of curiosity what is ectasy like? I have always been curious yet hesitant to try it!

            • Ren says:

              it really depends on the quality of the shit you get…and I think the era of where most of the shit was good quality is long gone (at least around where I am)…was expensive too, but you GOT what you paid for! Now, a lot of folk will rave on about how great sex on it is, but i was so not ever in the mood to have sex while on it, but it did make me very into tactile stuff; knuckle popping, back rubs, things like that…and I alway sort of felt like what whatever emotion I was having at the time was super good moods were awesome, but if my temper got flaired up, woo, watch out….and it was a fun one to do out at places, like a club, with all the music and lights and people and stuff.

      • Joan Kelly says:

        hexy, what’s G? I have this feeling it’s something super obvious and I don’t know why it’s going over my head… but there are few drugs I don’t like either, and I like to hear about any I’m not already familiar with, ha.

        • hexy says:

          GHB, also known as “fantasy” or (inaccurately) as “liquid ecstasy”. I have concerns about the way most people I know use the drug (it should never be combined with alcohol, for one thing, and it’s a really risky drug for overdose as the level for overdose is really close to the effective dose, compared to other recreational drugs… I’ve seen too many friends take a fun little ride in an ambulance on that shit) but on a personal level I just don’t like how it feels. I’m not judging other people who choose to use it… I just want them to be informed and careful, and not act like irresponsible idiots about it.

          • joankelly6000 says:

            ah, okay, thanks for explaining. I thought it might be GHB (which I’ve heard of, though really never knew how it makes you feel until you mention that some people (however inaccurately) call it liquid ecstasy) but short cuts and nick names of things often throw me off. I never tried it myself.

  17. Aspasia says:

    My drug of choice is alcohol, specifically whiskey. I think my blood’s been officially replaced by Maker’s Mark. Or Jim Bean. 2nd choice is tied between wine, champagne and vodka. As far as “illegal” drugs, marijuana is my only choice and really, only very occasionally. No urge to try anything else. But you know me, I support full decriminalization.

  18. DebSens says:

    Adderall is the only drug I have really experamented with, and this was a perscription. The experience was kind of scary but exciting at the same time….I could write for HOURS literally and also felt more creative…it was kind of scary being excited to do homework…..What makes me angry is since I have been off of it my ADHD seems like it is twice as bad!

  19. antiprincess says:

    I’m not a fan of stimulants. I think the world moves too fast for me on my best day, I have no desire to make it go faster.

    I used to love Oxycontin and really any morphine or morphine-like derivative, in fact just about anything in the sedative family. now just the word “narcotic” makes my stomach do weird nauseous flip-flops. but there’s nothing quite like valium and red wine to take the edge off a busy day. Pot I like, but I’m always afraid I’m going to set my face on fire. mushrooms are nice. lately since I’m nursing (and strung-out on oxytocin and other naturally-occurring feel-good hormones), all I can handle is an occasional beer. ok, a frequent beer.

    oh, hi polly. fancy meeting you here.

  20. Joan Kelly says:

    as a random public service announcement from one drug lover to any others who like mushrooms but hate the eating-things-that-taste-like-cowshit part, it’s my mission to spread far and wide the fact that you can easily make tea from your mushrooms.

    just put them in a pan with water, boil the water, turn down to simmer, let simmer for ten minutes at least (ten minutes was all my impatient ass could stand to wait for and it worked just fine), drain as mentioned through a strainer into a tea cup (so make sure that you don’t use too much water to boil/simmer them in, since you will be drinking it all), put lemon juice in it to help make it taste almost-good (and certainly worlds better than eating the shrooms themselves) and voila! A trip without the possibility of vomiting up those nasty fungi pieces!

    you are welcome, world-at-large.

    • Aspasia says:

      My bff’s boyfriend Todd likes to make mushroom tea, but he said that sometimes if it’s steeped too long (or something) then the tea can make you sick. Does that sound familiar? I forget specifically what he said, but I just remember that one of the steps, if done incorrectly, can make the drinker sick. He’s also a master at making something else with ‘shrooms. I think it was some sort of pastry.

      • Joan Kelly says:

        huh. Maybe my greed to get the drugs in me as soon as possible saved me from the toxicity risk of steeping too long? I just knew I had heard that the chemical that makes you high in mushrooms is water soluble, so I thought, AHA, tea!, I leave the shit-tasting-shrooms grossness to the uneducated! And steeping for ten minutes seemed to give me the full impact of the drugs. So maybe don’t simmer more than ten minutes before draining? happy tripping to whoever tries it!

        • Aspasia says:

          That was probably it. I just asked bff yesterday what else is on his ‘shrooms menu, he apparently also makes a soup with it. I told him he needs to make a cookbook of all his recipes. Like to see America’s Test Kitchen compete with THAT!

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