…but first, a few random thoughts and things that go through my head at 4:26 am when, well, its me, I don’t sleep.
And I preface this with I am anti-social and everything. But you know, being anti-social, I’ve never figured that was something I can whip out as an excuse when I am an asshole. And trust me, I am an asshole a lot…but when I am an asshole, you know, I sorta expect people to be like “”Jesus Fuck, Ren, you are bein’ an asshole!”, to wit, I would say “Well, yeah, I am an asshole, why does this shock you?” I mean, I’d own up to being an asshole and say yep, I reckon you pegged me right there…and not make excuses for it or figure any sorta oddness with my wiring was a reason for folk not to just say “You are an ASSHOLE!” So…after I have been out and about reading in bloganistan, which I really should not do, I have begun to wonder: Are there legit reasons that some people get to act like freakin’ assholes and other people seem so hesitant to call them on it? I mean, if you can put a check in a certain column, does that mean ya get a get outta assholery jail free card? How does that work? Is there some privilege or lack of privilege that makes assholery more acceptable for some than others? Is it a guilt thing? So and so faces strife X for condition Y so, well, we feel bad about X and Y so, well, they get to be assholes and go unchecked on that? Is that how that shit works? If so, butter my ass and call me a biscuit, cause I got a whole shit ton of X’s and Y’s that should gimme an Assholery with Impunity Card!
And another thing, as y’all know from a few entries down, I object to outting and threats because that shit is wrong no matter who it happens to, but ya know, this recent bout regarding outting and threats kinda makes me all grimly amused ala my buddy The Comedian, cause you know, when that shit happened to me there were only a hand full of people who had my back or even said one freakin’ word about it or publically “broke ranks” to call out one of their own’s assholery or any of that shit…and some of the folk who did it? I always suspected and now kinda know that the only reason they said shit all about it was because it served their own agenda. True enough for all things in life: some people are solid, and most people just ain’t.
Hell, I remember even in more recent history when I was asked to “prove it”, and I did, and then the entire entry with every linked bit of actual proof was DELETED by the person who asked because the fuckin’ proof was just too upsetting to the delecate fee-fees of the fuckin’ hyenas who cheered on my own personal wolf-packing.
Smirk, and people wonder why I like guns?
Anyway, we’ll spark up the drug talk soon enough again anyway, I’m just wonderin’ how much I wanna give the hyneas to chew on.