Hugo has a post up about how he has dealt with if not his full out personality disorder, personality flaw. I found it interesting cause well, a lot of folk I know, myself included, deal with similar things on a daily basis and while all of us might have different “quirks” going on and different ways of dealing with them (some good ways, some not so good), it is something we deal with pretty much daily in order to function, and heck, better than function-be a part of- like for real- the rest of the world around us. Which can honestly be on some days a full time job. Now, I say this as an antisocial type. That was my big ping on that cluster Hugo was talkin’ about over there, the antisocial one. And yep, if ya go and look that one up to see what it is, aside from the oh, hurting animals thing I do run the checklist there-or have at some point in my life, often. I have mellowed some with age-as can happen with Antisocial types (less hormones, less angst, less…energy) there is the simple fact that kinda like Hugo talks about there…I have a different kind of thought process and have to do things differently than most folk in order to even interact reasonably normally with most folk. Sometimes I succeed, sometimes I sorta succeed, sometimes I fail miserably, but yeah, there is process that invovles the rearranging how one would “naturally” go about doing things, and there is also a line you gotta keep so you don’t beat yerself up endlessly (or beat up other people endlessly) and realize that even if you aren’t “normal”, well, you are a person who deserves some good and happy and whatnot just like other people- and wanting that isn’t bad.
What I tend to struggle the most with is assuming that folk who seem like me or whatnot are actually like me. It’s odd, when I meet folk who seem or present very similar to me, I have a habit of thinking hey, they get it, they are like me, so, yeah, we’re on the same page and get shit the same and at first that seems…freakin’ awesome. That someone has the same shit goin’ on and has to do the same things wrt to other people and sorta has the same view of the world as me and look, with this person I don’t have to do all the stuff I gotta do with other people….and then I find out I am wrong. Totally. Which is always a huge, huge mess. It’s happened with me a few times, and thusly, I now have to add to my to do list “never assume regardless and always do all that shit in your head you need to do”…which is like a big check list really and a forced rewiring of how your process shit…but hey, it’s what I gotta do in order to be a part of the world rather than want to burn it to the ground.
Damn, am I cheerful or what?
In any event, I liked Hugo’s post and think it took balls to write it as there are a lot of folk out there who look for reasons to go after him and shit to go after him with.